Vulnerability & Trust

Why your softness is the gateway to deeper intimacy

Mach es besonders

“There’s nothing wrong with you for wanting to be held.

There’s nothing wrong with you for protecting your heart.

The question is: what would it take to trust again?”

We talk a lot about connection these days.

We share reels about boundaries, relationship goals, communication hacks.

And yet… so many of us feel alone in love.

Not because we don’t want intimacy –

but because we’ve armored ourselves so deeply that we no longer know how to let it in.

We long to be held, but we’re terrified to soften.

We want to be met,

but we’ve learned to stay one step ahead – just in case.

Because here’s the truth:

Trust isn’t built on logic.

It’s built in the body.

In slow moments. In honest ones.

In the trembling, messy, unscripted places where we dare to be real.

This post is a love letter to the part of you that wants to trust again.

To the softness that’s never been wrong – only unprotected.

And to the wild, sacred truth that vulnerability is not weakness.

It’s your portal to deeper love, embodied intimacy, and connection that actually nourishes.

Why we fear vulnerability – and why it’s human

Let’s start with compassion.

If you’ve learned to hide your truth, it’s not because you’re broken.

It’s because your nervous system is wise.

Somewhere along the way, you learned that vulnerability was unsafe.

Maybe you opened your heart and were met with silence.

Maybe you cried and were told to toughen up.

Maybe your softness was used against you – manipulated, shamed, ignored.

So your body did what bodies do:

It protected you.

It learned to guard, to please, to analyze, to leave before being left.

But here’s the paradox:

What once kept you safe… now keeps love out.

What real intimacy requires isn’t perfection. It’s presence.

Intimacy doesn’t come from saying the right thing or playing the game.

It comes from being seen in your rawness – and choosing to stay.

Real connection isn’t found in the perfect text or the best boundaries list.

It’s in the quiver of your voice when you say,

“I’m scared to lose you – and I want to stay open.”

It’s in the moment you don’t have it all figured out – and still show up.

It’s when your partner sees your messy edges and doesn’t turn away.

Trust isn’t built through control. It’s built through presence.

Through showing up without the mask.

Again. And again. And again.

Your body remembers – and it wants to soften

You don’t need to push yourself to open.

You don’t need to rush.

Your softness is sacred, not a performance.

Let your body lead.

Start with the breath.

Let your exhale lengthen.

Let your shoulders drop.

Let the trembling be there.

Softness is not passivity.

It’s aliveness.

It’s the language of a body that feels safe enough to stay.

Three ways to practice vulnerability (without overwhelming yourself)

1. Speak your truth before it explodes

Practice naming what you’re feeling in the moment – even if it’s clumsy.

Not to fix or get validation, but to stay honest.

“I notice I want to shut down.”

“I feel tender right now.”

“I’m not sure what I need – but I want to stay present.”

2. Let someone really see you

Choose a friend, a partner, a therapist – someone safe.

And let them see you in your emotion. No filter. No explanation.

Just you, breathing and real.

3. Slow down with your body

Instead of rushing through discomfort, meet it.

Place a hand on your chest. Feel the heat.

Give yourself permission to soften – even if it’s just 2% more.

This is your invitation to trust again

You don’t have to become fearless.

You don’t have to have it all together.

You just have to be willing to bring your truth into the room.

Vulnerability is not about falling apart for attention.

It’s about letting your walls melt – at the pace your body can hold.

Because only when you’re honest about what’s really there…

can someone truly meet you.

And isn’t that what you’re here for?

✨Real intimacy. Wild softness. Truth in motion.

Curious to learn how to get more intimate with yourself in order to become more intimate with others?

Have a look at my 1:1 offering.